You arrive home, and the first thing you encounter is a relative. They look at you, roll their eyes in judgment, pause… “Are you high again?” The rest of this scenario is self-explanatory. This and similar circumstances are more common than one may believe.
The subject of a loved one’s misuse of alcohol or drugs can bring about some very stressful relationships. We need not go into the consequences of addiction. If you live with a person who overconsumes substances, you’re quite familiar with it already.
As we know, addiction to alcohol or cocaine, opiates, or even pot has an outward, observable effect. You know when your husband, wife, son, or daughter is drunk.
First, you can smell the alcohol, you can see they are unstable, you can hear their slurred speech, etc.
With drugs, it’s a bit different. However, you can see the person sniffling way too much, their eyes may be bloodshot, or they are more fidgety, etc. We can see certain aspects of drug use.
However, a whole list of unseen indicators affects the person who overconsumes, as evidenced in addiction counselling.
Behind the outward appearances of substance misuse is the issue going on internally. Anything that bothers the person from the inside: their thoughts, feelings, emotions, discomfort, and more.
Anyone who overindulges in some mind-altering substance struggles with personal hardship, whether obvious to the individual themselves or not. There is an issue they are attempting to find relief from.
It may be an issue that another person may find unimportant. However, the person suffers silently from the situation and cannot find a solution. Most of the time, this issue is not quite identified without addiction counselling.
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When we go about our daily lives, we all experience some moments of feeling uncertain, concerned, or even fearful. Sometimes we may feel some “hidden influences.” We call them hidden influences because we sense something is not quite as it should be, but cannot put our finger on it.
When a person can spot the problem, there is a sense of relief, and the condition tends to diminish.
Though usually we cannot spot the exact issue of why we feel the way we do, we nevertheless dismiss it. It can happen at a job interview, while attempting a new relationship. It can happen at any moment of the day or week.
For someone who misuses drugs or alcohol, this hidden influence is so continuous that it acts as a permanent condition. The condition is different for every person. There may be similarities, but the content will not be the same.
For example, two different people could experience rejection from a love interest. The condition of “rejection” may trigger a sense of “unworthiness” for one, while it creates a feeling of anger in the other.
As mentioned above, the unwanted issue can linger and be a continuous condition. Seeking relief, the person turns to drugs or alcohol as a solution for their numbing or “unfeeling” effect. It leads to addiction, but in fact, it would necessitate counselling.
Part of the barrier to uncovering these hidden influences is the numbed state of addiction. Drugs and alcohol cloud the mind and bury emotions. Before ridding the body and mind of the toxic effects of drugs and alcohol, any addiction counselling results in little or no progress.
This explains the reason all drug rehabs require a prior detox before counselling. The detox step permits the body and mind to stabilize the individual into a more communicative and responsive state.
For relatives of someone who has an addiction problem, attempts to extract reasons why the person is drinking to excess, or doing cocaine, etc.,
only add complexities. The individual searches for the reason and gets lost in the cloud of unknowns.
It isn’t wise to assume you can have a proper conversation with someone under the influence of harmful substances. At best, you will get responses that are only disassociated thoughts.
A professional interventionist will recommend that you wait for the person to gain some clarity of mind to bring up the subject of help for their condition.
A key factor in dealing with substance misuse is recognizing that the person using is doing so as a solution. It is a solution to an unwanted problem. The problem is that it causes discomfort and pain in some form or another. The solution is to numb it out.
Drugs and alcohol, including some medications, have the properties of a numbing agent. But they also bring about a dependency on a physical and mental level.
A problem will only be solved when it is identified, which is done with addiction counselling.
Professional detox addresses the toxic aspect, and addiction counselling addresses the underlying problem. The counselling gives the person some self-worth and confidence and helps identify the underlying issue(s) of addiction. It also improves the person’s ability to deal with daily life and emotions.
Many drug rehabs will have a variety of trained counsellors in different fields of expertise. One should ask the substance abuse professionals about the services offered before signing up. If you need help, we are here to answer your call in Canada.
Author,
Substance Use Disorder & Recovery Professional,
Referral & Consultation Counsellor
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